[ Of all the cruel things he could do, and that he has done to Crowley -- pretending like Aziraphale doesn't still think of him and love him as the whole of his parts, the snake and the troublemaker yes, but the creator, the hanger of stars, the being who couldn't forget how to love -- denying him their friendship would be one step far too cruel.
The drive is excruciatingly long, and marked so deeply with silence. Aziraphale tries and fails several times to come up with something to fill up the space with something besides the music, because not to do so means being alone with his thoughts and with possessing an imagination so wild as to compete with Crowley's, it's certainly dangerous territory. He's glad to have Crowley punctuate the silence, and give him something else to think about besides the grip of his fingers on the wheel and the pattern on his new shirt. ]
I thought maybe you had changed your mind, you never mentioned it again. It wasn't until I found out about the heist that I realized you were still looking.
[ There's a bit of a pause, and Aziraphale holding his hands as fists on his thighs, but he speaks up. ]
I couldn't let you go through with it. I still don't like it, but I can't let you cause your own destruction out of desperation, especially not for something I can provide.
[ Is he really talking about just the holy water anymore? He supposes he never really was, hiding behind things to say for the things he would really like to say instead. But he also really hopes it shouldn't come to that, that they can make another Arrangement in which they understand that love just doesn't conquer all, and haven't they been on this Earth long enough to know it? Hasn't Crowley, who has already fallen once, who has already seen God punish temptation when she herself was the one who placed the apple, ripe for picking, in the middle of Eden?
In actuality, it's a very short drive to the bookshop, and even though it's a busy night, there is miraculously a space to park right out front. Aziraphale gets out of the car and fumbles with the keys, something he hasn't done since the shop opened. ]
no subject
The drive is excruciatingly long, and marked so deeply with silence. Aziraphale tries and fails several times to come up with something to fill up the space with something besides the music, because not to do so means being alone with his thoughts and with possessing an imagination so wild as to compete with Crowley's, it's certainly dangerous territory. He's glad to have Crowley punctuate the silence, and give him something else to think about besides the grip of his fingers on the wheel and the pattern on his new shirt. ]
I thought maybe you had changed your mind, you never mentioned it again. It wasn't until I found out about the heist that I realized you were still looking.
[ There's a bit of a pause, and Aziraphale holding his hands as fists on his thighs, but he speaks up. ]
I couldn't let you go through with it. I still don't like it, but I can't let you cause your own destruction out of desperation, especially not for something I can provide.
[ Is he really talking about just the holy water anymore? He supposes he never really was, hiding behind things to say for the things he would really like to say instead. But he also really hopes it shouldn't come to that, that they can make another Arrangement in which they understand that love just doesn't conquer all, and haven't they been on this Earth long enough to know it? Hasn't Crowley, who has already fallen once, who has already seen God punish temptation when she herself was the one who placed the apple, ripe for picking, in the middle of Eden?
In actuality, it's a very short drive to the bookshop, and even though it's a busy night, there is miraculously a space to park right out front. Aziraphale gets out of the car and fumbles with the keys, something he hasn't done since the shop opened. ]